How much is too much? How much suffering can a person take before it overwhelms? This questions stares the reader of Walking through the Fire in the face.
After contracting polio as an infant and being misdiagnosed, Vaneetha Risner spent days on end in hospital for the first ten years of her life. When she was not in hospital, she was subject to relentless bullying. She expected her conversion to Christianity to make things easier, and it did—for a time. She graduated Stanford, secured her dream job, and married a classmate. But that was not the end of her suffering.
After four miscarriages, her son died due to a medical error. She was diagnosed with post-polio syndrome, which meant that she would likely become quadriplegic. Husband betrayed her and moved out, leaving her as a single mother to two adolescent daughters. It was hardly the abundant life she imagined.
Walking through the Fire is a deeply moving read, which details, in gripping prose and with raw honesty, Vaneetha Risner’s journey of loss and redemption. At times, it feels as if you have stepped into the mind of the psalmists as she details, with unnerving honesty, her deep wrestling with dark providence. Those who have shared her experiences might find her honesty at times unsettling, but the book is difficult to put down as she brings the truth of the gospel to bear on the traumas of life.
Through all her suffering, she has learned that God sometimes “allows what he can hardly stand to accomplish more than we understand” and that “no one can truly withstand suffering unless they know God truly stands with them.” In it all, she learned to trust the God who knows all things. “When we think we might write our story differently, it’s only because we don’t know the same things the Storyteller knows.”
Skilfully navigating the reader through her experiences of the three big Ds—disease, divorce, and death—she highlights God’s faithfulness in her darkness.
The book highlights the universality of suffering—though few, perhaps, will have suffered as much as she has. It draws attention to authentic faith in suffering, refusing to shy from or offer pat answers to difficult questions. But it also offers a profound message of hope, framing suffering not as meaningless, but as a path to experiencing God’s sustaining grace.
Though her experiences might easily have led to bitterness and blame shifting, she is transparent about her own failures and sins, which lends credibility to her detailing of others’ wrongs against her. She does not write to invite pity but to highlight the profound truth that God walks with his children in suffering, even when his presence is not immediately discernible. It will no doubt prove a helpful read to sufferers and to those who wish to draw alongside suffered in their lives, though the biblical truths on which she reflects will prove to encourage anyone who reads it.
Vaneetha notes that “suffering is inevitable but despair is not.” Along the way, she shares with readers several keys that have helped her to not give into despair in suffering.
She has learned that lament is not something to be overcome but is a crucial aspect of true worship. “I learned that lament didn’t need to be transformed—lament itself was an integral part of genuine trust and worship.”
She has learned that suffering is not purposeless. “It is purposelessness, not sorrow, that squelches joy. When we begin to understand God’s purpose—begin to glimpse him working for our good—we can experience true joy even inside our sorrow.” Even if we don’t receive all the answers to our why questions, we can be sure that God is using our suffering to make us more like Christ.
She has learned to view her affliction through the lens of resurrection, which has transformed her view of suffering.
Life is a journey, yes, but only if there’s a destination. I’m on my way to my Father’s house, and I absolutely cannot wait for the party. When I get there I will jog, run, sprint, race, and finally leap into the arms of my Savior.
In many ways, this is more than a memoir: It is a testament to enduring faith, spiritual honesty, and God’s transforming power in suffering. Risner wants the reader to see that, even in the fiercest fires, God does not abandon his people. He walks with them to offer purpose, peace, and deeper intimacy with him.
About the author
Vaneetha Risner is a writer and speaker who is passionate about helping people find hope in the midst of suffering. Part of her story is losing her infant son, which was the inspiration for the hit song “Held,” recorded by Natalie Grant. She is also the author of The Scars That Have Shaped Me: How God Meets Us in Suffering. Before she started writing, Vaneetha had a career in business and received her BS from University of Virginia’s McIntire School of Commerce and her MBA from Stanford Graduate School of Business. Vaneetha is married to Joel and has two grown daughters, Katie and Kristi.